Moggy is queen of the meme. Every so often, out of the thousand or so she posts per week, a meme catches my eye. This one did because it can be a lot of fun – or, if you’re a cutter, it can be used to expose your soul. No souls here, move along.
1. I have a slapshot that has been clocked at 98mph.
2. I had my first drunk when I was two. My parents took me on a picnic and forgot to bring juice. White wine was substituted, with expected results. My mom cried for two days afterwards because she thought she was a bad mother. She wasn’t. Ever.
3. I can explain the “beaver” euphemism to a woman at a professional football game while drunk without being rude. This is a gift, I treat it as such.
4. Despite all the clichés about “everyone dies alone”, I worry about dying alone.
5. My face is not my own. I had reconstructive surgery when I was 12 to rebuild/replace the bone and cartilage in my cheeks, nose, and jawline. The material used in the reconstruction was taken from two ribs on the right-hand side of my body. I have broken or cracked those ribs five times since the surgery because they’re weaker as a result.
6. I started taking things apart to figure out how they worked when I was eight. I didn’t get good at putting them back together until I was eleven. My dad let me live in spite of this discrepancy.