that’s exactly it

Man, Grumpy Chris managed to capture exactly how I’ve been feeling lately. I’ve been struggling to figure it out for myself… well… admit it to myself, and he just comes right out and says it.

You’ve got to decide if “coulda been” will be enough to wrap yourself up in when you’re 40 years old and looking at another day in a job you don’t really give a shit about, or if you want to either have your dream, or be secure in the knowledge that you gave it everything you had, and held nothing back. Even though I have to still remind myself of it when I’m scared to step out of my comfort zone, I sleep better at night when I can look back without regret. My soul is satisfied only when I’m drained from the battle, not when I hold my best efforts in reserve.

Damn skippy. I’m on closer-to-40-than-30 side of things, and I seem to be fixated on the “if only” from 2001 on. I think I’ve been stuck pretty firmly in a comfort zone that is boring as hell, and I will have to ditch it to make me happy. All I have to do is figure that part out. 😉

I have more thinking to do. Crap.

2 thoughts on “that’s exactly it

  1. The trick is knowing (not just understanding) that you could drop dead right now. Dead. Done. Regrets?

    We are, all of us, going to take the big dirt-nap and the only saving grace we have is knowing that death claims us all, regardless of our best intentions. So if you’ve got something hanging around the back of your mind, tugging at your short-and-curlies, then you’d best get to it or put it away forever. Decisiveness is your god now 🙂

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